Shackled and Bound

I’ve lost my voice.  No, I don’t have laryngitis, though that would be easier to remedy than what I’m referring to.  

Shackled-and-Bound

All writers experience it.  I suppose some might call it writer’s block but I’m not sure I want to go so far as to say that’s what it is.  I write mostly about my mental health and I’m tired of it.  I want to step outside of myself for a change.  I’ve often heard that we write about what we know and I suppose I am most intimately familiar with the journeys I’ve endured due to my mental health.

It’s exhausting, loves.  Depression has a way of trapping you inside this maze within your own mind that is entirely of your own making yet you, the maker, are incapable of finding your way out.  I am creatively shackled and bound at the moment.  I need to break free of these chains, I must break out of my uncomfortable comfort zone.

It may be slightly different for me, due to depression’s shawl of darkness ever-lurking in the corners of my soul.  Sometimes I believe my illness inspires my passion to create, though other times it definitely hinders.  Currently I feel paralyzed.

So this is me reaching out to you, my tribe of creative souls.  How do you step outside of yourselves?  How does one break down the very walls they built around themselves?  Do you ever feel this way or is my mind playing tricks on me?

I’d love to hear your input, please share your thoughts in the comments!

 

    

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21 thoughts on “Shackled and Bound

  1. I certainly can’t relate to exactly how you feel, but I understand. I get overwhelmed with all I want to do, need to do, angry that I’m not a success, and trying to figure out how to somehow make a career of what I’m doing that I just get overwhelmed and don’t want to do anything. At those times I find it best to just put everything aside for a day and spend that day brainstorming ideas for the paths I need to take to get myself back on track and re-motivated, then make a list of little goals to keep myself on that path (I usually fail at the social media goals, but….).

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    • I’m quite certain at this point that I won’t be making a career out of any of my creative endeavors, so I’m not really concerned with that aspect. I see what you mean in trying to set goals, though. I need to find a way to stretch my creative wings somehow, do something different… that’s what I’m struggling with at the moment. I’ll see if I can’t do some brainstorming, thanks for the suggestion!!

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  2. One way I try or find (not sure which) to step outside myself is in listening to the experience of others that may be far in some way from my own, whether it is in speech, writing, song, or history. Other than a lot of comments on blogs and FB, I’ve been in a bit of a writing drought lately. Breaking down walls is hard. I tend to like better the image of their being worn away somehow. I don’t think your mind is playing tricks on you about this. What I do hear is your writer self wanting to grow beyond the limits and subjects so far, to be at play in a wider field. Stepping out, even into a lovely, green meadow can still occasion some agoraphobia, but you can do it.

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    • Yes, it sounds like you know just what I’m talking about. It’s a very frustrating feeling but the more I think about it the more stuck I feel! I think reading is a good idea, perhaps I’ll find inspiration in the words of others…

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  3. Well, what else are you about? What things interest you? What else are you passionate about in life? See if you can put aside more of the memoir stuff for a while. Not forgetting about it, but just putting it slightly to the side. I don’t know if this is all that easy, if we’re talking depression, so maybe wait until you’re having a bit of a better day, if that makes sense. I’m not sure. I can write about my life with blindness for a long time, but there is more inside me. If you enjoy writing, I am sure there is more in there creatively for you to tap into too.

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    • It definitely makes sense. I want to put the memoir stuff to the side and explore other things and that’s what I’m struggling in doing ::sigh:: I adore writing and I KNOW there is far more inside me to tap into, I just can’t seem to get to it right now! THAT is what’s frustrating me, I know it’s there and I can’t seem to reach it. Thanks for your input, love 🙂

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  4. I don’t. Evidently. I get stuck and remain there, and write my (increasingly crappier) thankfuls each week, and attempt (on occasion) to have an opinion about some of the things which matter in the world, at the same time as being almost certain that my ‘voice’ is just reed-thin and plaintive, lost in the wind. I don’t seem able to get my oomph back.

    Interestingly I’ve written less since I’ve started reading more books. Maybe they’re to blame?

    ALLEGEDLY massage therapy can unblock you because of the hormones it releases and the way they impact on the brain, so if you get the chance to treat yourself, maybe give that a try.

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  5. Have I ever been there! And yes, I’d say I’ve lost my voice, or that desire to write about what my life seems to be consumed by.
    Do you love music? I do. I like to find a line in a song that moves me, and I write about it. Whether it stirs up emotions, stories old or new, even a poem that might not make sense to anyone else…
    Also, Google writing challenges or make up a 30 day challenge of your own! I’d help if you like😊
    I also doodle…with crayons…and scribble…like a toddler. It gets out the funk before I write. With PTSD and SGAD it’s easy to feel the weight of my world and letting some of that go before I dive into a post can work wonders.
    Sometimes I even find a moment when I’m out in the world that changed my perception for a moment-so I take a photo of it and use that to start my writing.
    But, when there are times nothing works…and THATS OKAY. I step back, sometimes for a few weeks and let my blog sit and rest. We all do. Whether for a real vacation or an emotional one.

    Liked by 1 person

    • That’s excellent advice!! I really like the one about using a line from a song, I may have to try that! I have writing prompts all over the place and ya know what? I haven’t even tried using one…. isn’t that ridiculous?!! I get SO bogged down in my head that I forget to utilize the simplest of tools at my disposal! I really appreciate your actionable advice here, you have no idea how helpful these tips might be for me 🙂
      I put so much pressure on myself to post weekly but you’re right, sometimes we have to take a break and let our blogs sit for a week or two (or more). ❤

      Liked by 1 person

      • I hope my advice helps a little. I too can give it but following it can be heavy in and of itself! Like right now, I have a story in my heart, but one I cannot share because it is SO heavy that it causes me to avoid my life all together if I try and put words to it. That’s usually when I avoid my blog like the plague..like now lol😜

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  6. My husband is a writer who’s been living in this state for a long time now. It’s rough to experience.

    I hate when I get that feeling – “The cursor’s just blinking at me!” I’ve read that sometimes “stream of consciousness” type of writing can help break that creativity loose. Mostly, listen to what we call “creative voice.” Put your “critical voice” in the corner and just let your mind wander and write that. Don’t tell yourself it’s bad or wrong or anything like that. Just write the thoughts in your head. You might be surprised at the story that comes out. 🙂

    *hugs*

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