Have you asked yourself recently what is really important?
There are times in life we realize we no longer recognize ourselves. So many things can cause this malady; busy life, demanding job, toxic friends, exhaustion, environment, illness, loss, and much more.
One day you look around inside yourself, check the dusty corners of your heart, open forgotten doors inside your soul; and you realize you don’t recognize much of what’s going on in there anymore. Even your mind could use a good squeegee, it’s like one of those decorative windows way up high that nobody can reach to clean so they only get cleaned every few years.
I have lost sight of what is really important. Life has lost its luster, flowers their scent, words their meaning and I’ve stopped actively participating in nurturing my own heart and soul. There’s only one thing to do at this point. I have to get back to basics. And the first question I have to answer is…
What is really important?!
Love. Love is what’s really important to me. Love in all aspects of life. Love that means something, that is mutual and reciprocal. I no longer have the time or energy for people who only want to take and give nothing in return. I have always been a loving person, going out of my way for people because I truly care. I must be a bit more selfish with my love right now in my life. I will sit back quietly, I will observe behaviors and listen closely, but I will hold my heart close. I do think it’s beneficial to talk less and listen more, I believe you can learn a lot that way.
I think it’s important to have a love for your work as well, especially since we spend 40+/- hours per week there! I don’t have my dream job, but it’s the best job I’ve ever had. There are writing aspects and graphic design and typography aspects, so I consider myself pretty fortunate! I’ve learned a lot since I started and knowledge is power so I feel good about that. I enjoy the people I work with, and that is also important.
I love creating, sometimes it is the only air I can breathe. Writing calms my nerves and gently wipes the tears from my eyes. It wraps its arms around me and urges me to go on. It assures me I will feel better and maybe someday my words will be important to someone else, too. Writing is my sword as I fight the demons that haunt my days and fill my nights.
The most important aspect of love…
The love I share with my husband. He is my strength, he makes me feel safe, he tells me I’m beautiful, and I know he loves me no matter what. He is my family and my home. Together we will persevere, the two of us. He knows me, he knows who he married and what he signed up for before marrying me. He chose me, just like I chose him. We are not perfect, but our love is strong and we are determined. People keep telling me I need to believe, well I believe in us and I believe in our love.
Back to Basics
Focus my energy. Focus on love. Do the best I can at my job, nurture the friendships made through writing, keep writing, and give everything I have to my person – my love, my husband. This is what is important to me. I will find myself again this way.